Give me your bow of burnished steel,
Your arrows sharp and deadly,
Give me your pure and righteous zeal –
To kill this scum directly.
What has been done my wretched child?
Explain why you are shaking;
Before I grant you vengeance wild,
Make sure you’re not mistaken.
He promised love, he promised true,
He promised me forever –
And then I caught him screwing Sue,
He liked to fuck whoever.
I cannot give you back his love,
I cannot change his cruelty;
I can however dispose of
His harmful promiscuity.
I’ll slice and dice his manhood dear,
I’ll do it very slowly;
And in return you’ll volunteer –
You’ll join my Hunters wholly.
You’ll take no man of any kind;
You’ll live in my protection,
You’ll give your word – have peace of mind,
A life without rejection.
I promise you, I promise true,
I’ll hunt with you forever;
Now slice and dice his manhood through,
He’ll never fuck whoever.
Image: Apollo and Artemis, Attic Red Figure Tondo attributed to Brygos, c.470 BCE/ Louvre Museum, Paris