Dear Father Christmas, a.k.a. Santa,
All I really want for Christmas is an end to:
- Global warming
- Environmental destruction
- Exploitative labour practices
- White supremacist capitalism
- Corporate digital surveillance
- Mass incarceration
- Domestic violence
As all of these issues are clearly beyond your power to change and eradicate, I would settle for the Tories not winning the General Election on Friday.
Yours in gratitude,
A despairing citizen of the U.K.
P.S. If you do indeed succeed in thwarting BoJo’s ambitions, I will never again say that you were invented by the Victorians as a privileged, white, paternal man; given a saccharine dusting of red by Coca-Cola for the express purpose of turning the entire population into weapons of rampant, unsustainable consumption.
P.P.S. Thanks Santa. Evidently you are Conservative. Which given your age, gender, ethnicity, income and labour practices (elves working night shifts), doesn’t really surprise me at all.